I know this comes as no surprise, but I could be a roaming gypsy. I could travel by air, sea and train. Cowboy…not so much! On second thought, scratch train off that list because my last adventure that included a Cowboy and an Amtrak was a complete disaster from the get go! And if I’m being totally honest, it would be my version of hell in a poop-lined basket! Never, EVER again! But that’s another story.
On 4G the running joke is to see how soon Cowboy starts to pout when I mention the word “travel”. I’m not kidding y’all. He acts like 2 year old that just had his lollipop stolen right out of his hand MID-LICK. After being married to this dude for 30 years, I know that if it’s going to be a “Cowboy trip”, I have to approach the whole “travel” thing very gently. I learned this from two of the smartest women I know…my mama and Cowboy’s mama. They said that a woman could make a man do “just about anything” if he thought it was HIS idea.
Hmmm, let’s just ponder that for a minute,
How in the world does that work?! Cowboy’s idea of traveling is driving from one end of 4G to another. If I even mention the word “travel”, he runs out the door BACKWARDS! I have never seen anyone exit a building that wasn’t on fire as quick as that dude!
Cowboy would prefer to stay on our green acres 24/7. I don’t blame him a bit because it’s his happy place and it is beautiful out here. But…I would be a wilted flower if I couldn’t broaden my horizons by traveling. I need culture, people and new places to see. Cowboy says it’s always a good day when he doesn’t see pavement. And, I think it’s a good day when I hop into my car and wipe the dust off of my cheetah print shoes!
So back to making Cowboy think that a trip is his idea…
After much pondering, I finally figured it out…
On “Cowboy trips” which are trips that included him (obviously), I would casually bring it up twelve months from when I wanted us to go. Then I would bring it up again six months, then 3 months…you get the picture right?
ME: (casually talking about a trip to Cowboy) Have you ever been on a cruise?
COWBOY: No and that sounds like a terrible idea. What if one of us gets seasick? Can you imagine being stuck in a room the size of a cardboard box? And for the record, every time we go on a trip it doesn’t go well. Or have you forgotten?
ME: That doesn’t happen very often. And if we get sick, they have a doctor on board and medicine. It’s sounds fun to me.
COWBOY: The only thing fun about it would be getting off the boat. I’m out.
SIX MONTHS LATER-
ME: Remember that cruise we were talking about? You had mentioned that you would want to get off the boat as often as you could? I found one that stops at 3 ports. Some of our friends are going. I think it would be fun!
COWBOY: So when is this again?
ME: It’s in six months. Don’t worry you have plenty of time to prepare yourself for it.
Ok y’all, let me just say that when we go on a trip together, Cowboy is “all in”. He is up for anything that I want to do. We start out having so much fun, but for some reason, our trips end up on the wrong side of bad. But I am an optimist and feel like that’s in the past and we shouldn’t give up.
On the cruise we snorkeled, danced, gambled and we even did a zip lining excursion. Just picture that…Cowboy on a zipline with his wranglers, boots and hat. I bet those people in Progresso had a good laugh!
Everything was going great…until the 3rd night…
I woke up to me falling out of bed. That boat was swaying so bad I thought I was on a tilt-o-world ride at the carnival! And then it happened… I started to get sick. I couldn’t get to the bathroom fast enough! Have you ever been in one of those bathrooms? I promise you, it’s the size of a refrigerator! Cowboy opens the door and hands me a cold rag…
COWBOY: (Chuckling) Wasn’t this a great idea! I just love cruises. Especially since people aren’t usually seasick.
‘Till next Sunday y’all- Tammy