GO MEANS STAY (Story #1)
I have to tell ya that dogs have a unique way of conveying what’s on their minds. I say dogs because I am not a cat person, no offense, but I’ve never been a fan of the feline kind. Did I ever tell you the story of when Boy Wonder was born and Sweet Girl wanted to trade him in for a kitten because he cried so much? Her little world got turned upside down when we brought him home. But she soon became fond of him and vowed to be his forever cheerleader.
Anyhoo, I’ve decided to put a voice to our Maggie girl. Why you ask? Well I’ll tell ya why…because if she were a human, I picture her as being a middle-aged, strong-willed, Louisiana coon***….whoa, let’s just keep this “G” rated folks! Let’s just say that her cajun attitude would be laissez les bon temps rouler (lay-ZEH leh BAWN taw ROO-leh) which means “let the good times roll and Je vais faire ce que je veux which means “I’m gonna do what I want, when I want”. Yep! That pretty much sums up Maggie Mae.
Just so we’re clear…you can give her all of the commands you want to…and she will do those commands…when she is good and ready. It’s nothing personal. She just has a mind of her own and can be a little on the stubborn side…except when it comes to her human, Cowboy.
ME: (speaking to Maggie and trying to get her to load up in my car) Come on girl, let’s load up and head for home.
MAGGIE: (lazily looking my way) Non (nope).
ME: Maggie let’s go, I’m hungry!
MAGGIE: Ce n’est pas mon probleme, cheri (not my problem lady).
ME: (dragging Maggie by the collar, who, by the way weighs 80 solid pounds) I said LET’S GO! (I’m grunting) Why are you being so stubborn?
MAGGIE: (who has now decided to plant her hiney firmly on the ground) Umm, I’m just gonna stay here for awhile longer and hang out with our Cowboy. So laisse-moi tranquille (LEAVE ME ALONE)!
Cowboy saunters over to see what the ruckus is all about.
COWBOY: Maggie load up.
MAGGIE: (Notices Cowboy walking toward us and stands at attention, like she’s been doing that this whole time) Oui monsieur! (Yes sir!)
ME: (looking at Maggie) For the love of God! Could you not have done that to begin with?!
MAGGIE: (giving me the stink eye) Tu es si penible (you are so annoying).
’til next Sunday y’all- Tammy
